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Is it Titty-Starter? Is it Kick-Boobie? No! It's MyFreeImplants.com, a new Kickstarter-like site offering to crowdfund your new sweater puppies (with a catch).

Case in point, Ms. Gemini Smith. She's Cramlington, Northumbria's most sought after undertaker. But these days she spends less time interring stiffs than she does making them, thanks to her newly minted 34DD's! Yowza!

But you won't be surprised to learn she wasn't always the most competitive Zeppelin race in Cramlington, no sir. Gemini told the Daily Mail how, when she was 16, her classmates were in full bloom, while her pumpkin patch just refused to sprout. Different strokes for different folks, but she wanted boobs, so, what can you do?

One day, the 23 year old undertaker discovered My-Free-Implants.com. The site combines traditional cam-whoring with kick-starter like crowdfunding! Here's how it works. Women who want new boobs create a profile, and generous perverts pay cash to chat with them. When their tips reach the top, she sends that money to a surgeon who installs the cam-girl's new endowment. Badda-bing, badda-boom, tig 'ol bitties!

Successful cam-girls may then show their gratitude to the titty contributors, or just peace out and start enjoying life on top. While Gemini managed to afford her cockeyed cardigan crawlers in just three months, a majority of women actually waste years chatting to mouth breathers for spare change.

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