The suicide of actor Sushant Singh Rajput has shaken everyone to the core. The young boy who came from Bihar to the city of dreams- Mumbai was an inspiration for many. His death has started a debate on how outsiders are treated in the Bollywood industry. Actor Manoj Bajpayee, who also hails from Bihar and is a self-made star has revealed that even he had suicidal thoughts at one point of time. In a recent interview, he said, “I was an outsider, trying to fit in. So, I taught myself English & Hindi–Bhojpuri was a big part of how I spoke. I then applied to NSD, but was rejected thrice. I was close to committing suicide, so my friends would sleep next to me & not leave me alone. They kept me going until I was accepted.” Talking about his childhood and struggles, he said, “I’m a farmer’s son; I grew up in a village in Bihar with 5 siblings–we went to a hut school. We led a simple life, but whenever we went to the city, we’d go to the theatre. I was a Bachchan fan & wanted to be like him. At 9, I knew acting was my destiny.But I couldn’t afford to dream & continued my studies.” He also told how tough his life was, when he moved to Mumbai. He told, “Initially, it was tough–I rented a chawl with 5 friends & looked for work, but got no roles. Once, an AD tore my photo & I’ve lost 3 projects in a day. I was even told to ‘get out’ after my 1st shot. I didn’t fit the ideal ‘hero’ face–so they thought I’d never make it to the big screen. All the while, I struggled to make rent & at times even a vada pav was costly.” Despite all the difficulties and rejections, Manoj didn’t give up. He kept chasing his dreams. And after years of struggle, he has made his own name in the entertainment industry.